On December 28th, 2020 I had surgery on my right shoulder. With that surgery it caused me to be extremely dependent - in fact I didn’t realize how dependent I would be and how long it would be. I’m kindof, well, really alot independent, so this was a huge stretch for me, but the surgery was a must.
A few months ago my physical therapist told me that I was doing really well and had gotten most of the motion that I was going to get back. That was really exciting, but there were still some things that I couldn’t do and no matter how hard I tried I couldn’t do certain motions. I finally asked him about it and he said that it’s common to not get some of those motions back. I was like, oh, well that will impact how or if I can do certain things again. On top of these things over the last month I’ve lost some of the motion and range again - more pain has come back into my shoulder so back to many physical therapy exercises to get the range back.
Since December 28th there are certain things that I’ve not been able to do every single morning to get ready. For 5 months I’ve been dependent every single day to get ready for the day. I’ve definitely made a ton of progress and there’s been celebration as I’ve been able to do one more thing by myself. So grateful for the progress!
Today was the FIRST SATURDAY in 2 months that we could sleep in. I decided I wanted to be lazy and stay in bed a little later than 9:00 and Rick had a baseball practice. I think we both thought I would wait until he got home to help me, but I thought, nope, I want to see if I can do this on my own today and knew we would be in a hurry once he got home to head to the baseball field for games for the rest of the day!
I did it!!! I did everything on my own except for a couple of things that could wait until Rick got home. I was soooo proud of myself! SUCCESS!!!
Here’s the other side of the story. . .
As I thought about the experience this morning I thought about how rewarding it was to be independent - to prove to myself that I can do things on my own - I don’t have to rely on others. That was a huge WIN for me!!!
Then I thought about how much I’ve enjoyed the time I’ve had with Rick each morning. It’s kind of been that standing appointment for us to know that we had time together, time to visit and it’s been nice to know that he’s always there to help me, support me and NEVER ONCE has he ever complained about helping me. It’s something he’s enjoyed too.
In fact, through this experience it’s strengthened our marriage. We can go much further in one boat, rowing together and working together instead of at times being in our own boats working towards the same direction, but separately.
I’ve also learned the great value of letting others in my life. When we have a team we can save time, don’t have to feel worn out, take better care of ourselves and we can be stronger and things go much smoother. The outcome might be the same whether we go it alone or with others, but the journey can be so much different and we’re not meant to go this journey alone.
A wife and mother of 4 boys and 2 daughter-in-law, I have spent my entire adult life devoted to my family. I have been busy in their schools, supporting them in all of their school work, sporting events, activities, etc. I spent years heavily involved in the PTA, church callings, etc Life for me has always been overwhelmingly busy. While I thought this was my sanity, the truth is it masked issues - real issues - that I needed to work on to gain true sanity. I am sharing my story in this blog. I do this so that I might be able to help other women find their true sanity