Beauty in the Commotion
Both Rick and I had been to our primary care physician this week for our annual check ups. We both needed blood work and Tanner and I had both been to the lab at our doctors office this week and things hadn’t quite worked out so our doctor suggested that Rick and I go over to the hospital to get our blood drawn.
I have super terrible veins. They are small, don’t like needles and over the last 10 years of having blood drawn every 3 - 4 months I generally have to be poked many times, dug around in my arm, vein finder and lots of other tricks to get blood. I have to make sure I drink lots of water the day before, keep warm, etc. I’ve asked for all of the possible tricks so that I can help when I go in. As an example of how bad my veins are when I went in for my hysterectomy several years ago the anesthesiologist wasn’t super patient and after a few attempts at a normal place he said I’m in a hurry and put the IV in my neck - ya it hurt and was a super pain the couple of days I was in the hospital.
So, yesterday morning Rick and I both went to the hospital for our blood work. We’re greeted by a kind worker who confirms we are wearing our masks, gives us a squirt of hand sanitizer and gets us checked in - due to covid the worker enters our names on the computer. Then we’re invited to sit down anywhere we’d like in the lobby and wait for registration.
The hospital is super busy. People coming and going. The parking lot was packed full of cars. I’m guessing getting last minute things taken care of before insurance starts over, but then I’m sure for many there wasn’t a choice and they needed to be there. Maybe family coming to visit their loved ones. Some visiting, some smiling, some looking very heavy trodden - I find myself watching people and if I make eye contact I always love to smile and say hi in hopes of brightening someone’s day.
Also, there was a sign as we walked in the hospital to wipe off our feet to help keep the floors dry, clean and for the safety of everyone. It had been snowing, mixed with rain, so there was lots of mud and could easily make things dirty in the hospital.
As Rick and I were getting checked in to go to registration I noticed a young lady in a beautiful black dress, with her harp and setting her music out to start playing off in the corner. As she started to play I thought to myself, “I just want to sit here all day and listen to her play.” She was playing beautiful Christmas music. I didn’t feel in a rush, honestly I could listen to her music and use some relaxation for a few minutes.
We were called up to registration shortly after our check in with the greeter. The kind lady helping us decided to check us both in quickly instead of having us take the tablets and go back and sit down. Due to covid there’s no chairs at the registration desk anymore. The lady was checking Rick in first. She asked for his drivers license, insurance card and was needing his signature and initials.
There was someone in the background vacuuming the entryway, trying to keep it clean. The greeters were checking in other people, there were people talking in the lobby - there was lots of noise and things going on, but I had zoned out to where I just heard the harp. I heard the other sounds, but they weren’t affecting the beauty of the harp music. I was so focused on the music that I think the lady doing the registration wondered if I was alright and she apologized for not having chairs for us to sit in and I shared with her I was totally fine and that I was just enjoying the harp music. She commented how it was a beautiful sound to the day and I commented on how it seems so symbolic of life - how there’s so much going on around us, lots of noises, things to do, but there is beauty to be found among everything.
Both Rick and I got registered, checked in for the blood draws and asked to have a seat and wait to be called back. We were just a little bit around the corner and down the hall from the harp, but if we sat in the right place we’d be able to hear the beautiful music so we did. I just wanted to close my eyes and take in the beauty. Life definitely brings so much commotion. I thought about all of the different reasons people might come to the hospital, the reasons Rick and I were at the hospital getting blood drawn and thinking about the test I’d be having next week and hope that we could find some answers.
They called us back and I was joking with the girl that took us back that my veins are super difficult and she said we’ve got this. After two attempts she didn’t have it. She felt so bad and said let me go get someone else. In comes a guy that was super nice and did all he could to get the blood drawn and he got a trickle, but the blood clotted and it didn’t work out. After two pokes he felt bad and said let me go get the best one here. A cute girl came in and they were all talking to me, feeling bad and I told them we are all on the same team. I know they did their best and I’m grateful for their efforts and I was doing great! I’m grateful they gave it their best and honestly all I wanted was to have my blood drawn so I didn’t have to come back again. Plus, I can’t start on some medication until the blood is drawn so that we have a baseline and I was ready for that to happen.
As I left the hospital yesterday I was grateful for the commotion. I was grateful for the interactions I had with the different people at the hospital. I was super grateful for the harp music. For the beauty this young lady brought to all of us that were at the hospital for different reasons. For the reminder that we are all in this together. There is beauty all around us, we just have to choose if we will recognize it and choose to tune out the commotion to find it when things get really hard.
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A wife and mother of 4 boys and 2 daughter-in-law, I have spent my entire adult life devoted to my family. I have been busy in their schools, supporting them in all of their school work, sporting events, activities, etc. I spent years heavily involved in the PTA, church callings, etc Life for me has always been overwhelmingly busy. While I thought this was my sanity, the truth is it masked issues - real issues - that I needed to work on to gain true sanity. I am sharing my story in this blog. I do this so that I might be able to help other women find their true sanity